


Old Wounds

by VisionaryGalaxy



Series: The Symphony of Our Catastrophe [6]
Category: X-Men (Movieverse)
Genre: Boys In Love, Don't copy to another site, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Guilt, M/M, Nightmares, Post X-Men: First Class
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-06-20
Packaged: 2020-05-15 01:59:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19285795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VisionaryGalaxy/pseuds/VisionaryGalaxy
Summary: “I forgave you a long time ago.”“You shouldn’t have.”





	Old Wounds

   Erik had always been a light sleeper, even before Shaw had put the fear of God in him with late night sessions of pain and surprise attacks, all in the name of improving his little solider. He knew this because of a distant memory, fuzzy and indistinct, of him laying in his small bed and waking up every time his mother’s footsteps would creak across the old floorboards.

   Now of course, it wasn’t just habit that made him sleep lightly, no, it was Charles. At the moment they were in his rather enormous bed and Erik was staring down intently at his shadowed expression. He’d jerked in his sleep, which had woken Erik immediately, and now he was prepared to hold vigil until Charles’s subconscious decided whether tonight was good enough for nightmares.

   Erik sincerely hoped not. Charles hadn’t been sleeping well these past few days and every time he spotted the bruises beneath usually vibrant blue eyes, it felt like a punch to the gut, a personal failure.

   A soft whimper slipped from Charles’s lips, head thrashing to the side in a move that made Erik wince. Reaching across the small space between them, he nudged him gently, having learned long ago that too much contact during a nightmare caused his telepathy to lash out.

   As it was, Charles gave a full-bodied shudder as his eyes flew open, blinking rapidly in the dark. Erik didn’t need light to know his lover was drenched in sweat, skin pale as he fought to maintain his usually impeccable control.

   “Are you alright?” he asked gently.

   Charles seemed to cringe away from the words, sending a hard spike through Erik’s heart.

   “I’m fine,” came his ragged voice but Erik was already shaking his head.

   “You’re not. What was it about?”

   To Erik’s absolute horror, Charles raised his hands to his eyes, clearly trying to hide from the question, but it was the low-harsh sob that slipped from his throat that made Erik freeze. Charles didn’t cry, he never cried. The only time he’d ever shed a single tear had been almost a year ago now on a beach in Cuba where Erik had made the biggest mistake of his life.

   “Charles?” he tried helplessly.

   “It hurts,” Charles hiccupped. “My brain, I can feel it.”

   Erik was completely sat up now, leaning over Charles’s prone form, hand fluttering uselessly over him. With the words came a dull throb that he knew instinctively wasn’t his own but Charles’s projection.

   “Tell me how to help, tell me what to do!”

_Let me in. Please. Please. I need to hide. Please._

   Erik didn’t hesitate to reach over and pull Charles’s hands to his temples. _Come on, you know I want you there._

   Erik sucked in a harsh breath as Charles engulfed himself in his mind, his usually composed and smooth touch ragged around the edges. It was always a strange sensation, having someone else inside your head, but Erik had long gotten used to the feeling.

   Charles moved quickly, efficiently, wrapping himself up in a memory from only a week ago. The two of them before the roaring fireplace, blankets tucked over them both as they leaned against the couch. The wheelchair was waiting just behind them for their eventual trek to bed, though in the moment they were content to just exist there.

_Thank you._

_What happened?_

   Erik could feel Charles growing calmer by the moment, those bright blue eyes reverting back to their usual warmth. This wasn’t the first time Charles had woken up frantic or seeking solace in Erik’s mind. It was, however, the first time Charles had cried and claimed to be in pain from the nightmare.

_I’m sorry._

_Don’t do that. Please. Tell me what happened._

   Distantly, as though his body wasn’t truly his, Erik felt Charles pull him close to his side and could feel his lover laying his head comfortably on his chest.

_It was…an old nightmare. It took me off guard, I’m sorry for scaring you._

_I wasn’t scared._

_I’m inside your head you know._

   That one was tinged with some amusement, enough to put Erik back at ease. He wasn’t ready to give up though, squeezing Charles even closer to him, mindful of keeping his legs from becoming tangled with each other.

_I’d like to know, if you’re willing to tell me._

   Erik could practically feel the mental sigh. For half a second a memory, not a nightmare danced across his eyes.

   Shaw. A coin. Pain. Emptiness.

   Erik bit down on his lip hard enough to draw blood, the metallic taste filling his mouth as he struggled not to pull away from Charles. As it was, the man himself had tightened his arms in a death grip, as though anticipating that move.

_Its ok, I’m alright. I was just surprised._

_I’m sorry._ Erik couldn’t help but accompany the words with a variety of images depicting his self loathing.

   “Stop Erik.”

   The sound of Charles’s voice, very real and not in his head startled him.

   “I forgave you a long time ago.”

   “You shouldn’t have.”

   Charles leaned in and pressed a kiss to his throat and that alone nearly brought tears to Erik’s eyes. It had been almost a year since that day and he still couldn’t wrap his mind around Charles’s ability to treat him so tenderly after all the damaged he’d caused.

_I’m a saint like that._

   Erik shook his head at the attempt at humor, _I’m so sorry._

   Charles simply kissed him again, _ok apology accepted_. _You can make it up to me by holding me close all night, so I don’t have another nightmare._

   Erik very much doubted his presence was capable of anything other then _causing_ nightmares but since the day he’d returned begging for a second chance, he’d been a slave to anything and everything Charles wanted or needed.

   So, without complaint, Erik turned to face Charles and wrapped his arms securely around the smaller man and began stroking his hair as soothingly as possible. The guilt and self-hatred faded to a steady hum in the back of his mind as Charles drifted and Erik wondered, not for the first time, if that was another mutant ability of the man in his arms.

**Author's Note:**

> You will find I have an affinity for nightmare drabbles :)
> 
> Also the goal: One hundred of these drabbles. I've done it once I can do it again dammit!


End file.
